Showing posts with label Colombia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Colombia. Show all posts

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Scumbag Pablo: Escobar, the evil boss in memes

A TV channel decided to profit from the unspeakable evil genius Pablo Escobar. The lame excuse is that "the new generations need to know", like there is no YouTube nor Wikipedia out there. You see, Al Gore's invention is barely used by the youngsters, stubbornly clinging to their TV sets.   Here in sipmacrants! we won't do the same lame attempt as that dreadful TV channel, we will turn Pablo Escobar into a meme instead! 



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Sunday, January 22, 2012

World status update by country (taken from the Internet and modified)

I got this non-pc satire from the blog International Liberty. In these SOPA days sure I can feel nervous about knocking down an entire post, but it is awesome enough to deserve the reposting and even more worth of being added some new material.

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The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have therefore raised their security level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.” Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.” The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from “Tiresome” to “A Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the British issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from “Pissed Off” to “Let’s get the Bastards.” They don’t have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.
The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from “Run” to “Hide.” The only two higher levels in France are “Collaborate” and “Surrender.” The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France’s white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country’s military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout Loudly and Excitedly” to “Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat Operations” and “Change Sides.”

The Germans have increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance” to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels: “Invade a Neighbor” and “Lose.”

Colombia on the contrary, has lowered its alert level from “revolted, give’em hell” to “gullible, let’s hear them”, still away from the lowest level “naïve, let’s make a new constitution”.

Venezuela, maintains its only level since 1999 “paranoia, pretend those Yankees are after you to retain full power.”

North Korea is making its transition from “worker’s paradise” to “surreal” to “completely loony tunes”, which will be called later “normal”.

China is upgrading from “frenemy” to “only major player”, only if they can avoid the “implosion” status because of abusing the “everything’s fine” grade, without revealing its hidden housing bubble and railroad fiasco and infrastructure systems failures.

Argentina, after taking over the pensions system, upgraded from “perceived catastrophe” to “nothing to see here, pal”. The lowest level “real catastrophe, every man for himself” is somewhat consistent with its highest threat level “head in the sand.”

Russia has four levels: “I can get no respect”, “demand respect”, its current “extract respect” and “war”.


Alert level of this blog? Red, of course.

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Sunday, October 9, 2011

Note to farc: RELEASE THE GIRL. WITHOUT CONDITIONS. RIGHT NOW!

Nhora Valentina Muñoz is a 10-year old girl, yet she might be (outrageously) considered a “political hostage” and the payment of a ransom is even (unreasonably) expected. Why? It is not because she’s the daughter of the mayor of a small town in the northeastern part of Colombia. It is because the revolutionary armed forces of Colombia, a.k.a. farc frigging said so.

The almost 60-year old guerrilla does what it wants and there is not accountability to its horrendous crimes. It looks that when the guerilla is nearing to a negotiation of a peace treaty (as they are surreptitiously doing it now), it has to find a way to shock the public opinion and turn it against it. And boy they always find a (gory, revolting) way.

Horrendous crimes like the killing of a very old and beloved priest, the denial of the release of a kidnapped officer whose child was dying of cancer, and other alike criminal gestures preceded the abrupt ending of peace talks. If the guerilla honchos think that shows their strength at the negotiating table, they should have learned by now those actions only show their brutality, their inhumanity and their unwillingness to negotiate but to gain time, influence and terrain to control while sitting at the table.

Juan Manuel Santos, the current Colombian president, knows that the Colombians are not in the mood for a peace talk after the utter failure of the last effort the Pastrana administration made to reach the cherished goal. Colombians elected Alvaro Uribe Vélez to treat the guerilla with an iron fist and after he left office, they still want a defeated guerilla, not a negotiating one. Yet Santos tries to find a way to initiate peace talks with the highest secrecy. And the kidnapping of 10-year old girl shows pretty clearly which are the intentions of the guerilla, and most jaw dropping, they haven’t changed a bit in almost 60 years.


RELEASE THE GIRL. WITHOUT CONDITIONS. RIGHT NOW!
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Saturday, July 30, 2011

Richie Ray and Bobby Cruz - Tribute to Joe Arroyo: A Labor of Love

“They’ve gotten me into this mess/of interpreting Joe Arroyo’s salsa” says jokingly Bobby Cruz in the middle of “Pa’l Bailador”. It’s easy to understand then the feelings of the Dynamic Duo of Salsa when they make a tribute album about Joe Arroyo and his music, both from his Fruko y sus Tesos era and his solo career: It’s like stepping inside a house that is not theirs. But surprisingly Joe’s house resembles the one that belongs to them.

I defy any DJ to mix “Cabo E” (although disowned by Richie and Bobby because of their Christian faith, it is still a huge hit) and “Rebelión”, especially when you discover that “Cabo E” piano solo fits perfectly into “Rebelión” piano spot. “Tania”, with its jazzy piano arrangement it’s a no-brainer for Mr. Cold Fingers. Rhythm patterns of the Fruko songs resemble particularly those of the “Agúzate”, “Reconstrucción” and “Viven” albums, as I said before.

Bobby Cruz doesn’t sing but smoothly croons his way along the eleven themes preceded by an electrifying introduction theme sang by none other than Joe Arroyo himself, in maybe the last complete performance recorded ever before his untimely death. Joe appears in “Rebelión” and “La Noche”, too, but Bobby takes his task with impeccable profesionalism. It’s particularly hard for any singer, any accomplished singer, to perform properly “A Mi Dios Todo Le Debo”; however, el Durísimo achieves his soulful tribute to the Creator in a cumbia style, too.
Ricardo has a lot of respect for the original arrangements, so that they stay virtually the same, but somehow they get the Piano Ambassador’s distinctively treatment. For instance, the simple piano tune at the end of “Nadando” becomes a touching small solo and “La Noche” middle eight has a bluesy piano break. The lyrics are slightly changed when they feel it’s necessary (for example, in “Por Tí No Moriré”, “mi amor” becomes a more direct “Leonor”). And Bobby inspires his soneos, most impressively in the rap—reggaeton freestyle finale of “Yamulemau”, whose lyrics were drastically changed for a more direct homage to Joe.

It is necessary to congratulate that Colombian crew of musicians that took part in this project, originally conceived by Ley Martin, who finally overcame his regrettable shortcomings and came back to make salsa history again, as he did producing the original Colombia All Stars, Los Titanes and Raíces, not to mention those salsa festivals he organized.

In another world, the homage should have been made by Joe to Ricardo's and Bobby’s immortal salsa. Even this tribute was made when Joe was still alive. But if you really want to know; Joe and Fruko paid a lot of respects to them along their careers: in the huge Joe—Fruko discography you can find covers of “Ahora Vengo Yo”, “The Falling Rain”, and “Bomba en Navidad”, between others. But as I said before, Richie and Bobby’s influence permeates Joe and Fruko’s oeuvre. There is a decidedly obscure never-officially released Fruko y sus Tesos song called “Caifás”. If you hear it, it’s not difficult to imagine a young Joe listening to an already consecrated Bobby, teaching him how to reach those characteristically high notes of the Puerto Rican sonero.

I highly recommend this album; there will be other Joe Arroyo tributes without a doubt, but first, this was made while the Joe was still alive, and second, it will be difficult to find another more soulful and poignant like this. Go and get it!
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