Great expectations for Superman's "Man of Steel"

Superman hits the big screen again with "Man of Steel", and many are predicting a smashing weekend, with a box office score of 108 million, and maybe a total of 1.000 million at the end of the summer. Why? Because he's Superman, of course!

Sandler's Grown Ups Critics are just jealous children

It’s there anything better than being Adam Sandler’s buddy? Duh. Being Adam Sandler, of course. So, please, please don’t pay attention to those movie critics using epithets like inane, derivative, repetitive, immature… you name it. There’re just jealous. For real.

Consider this: picture yourself being a comedian making not only comedies, but successful comedies aimed to the low- and the middlebrow. Yep, no Woody Allen material, for starters. Making unpretentious movies is not the major offense to the critics, but not caring about them it is.
Adam Sandler has been releasing through Happy Madison a consistent string of hits that has made him a major box-office draw, besides, if he uses any theme that used with proper treatment could be “Oscar Gold”, he uses it lightheartedly: offensive humor sometimes, but not-so-offensive of too controversial statements. Additionally he uses a lot of familiar faces in his movies over and over again, not only from Saturday Night Live, but Kevin James, Henry Wrinkler and the hottest female A-listers, by the way. Some of them wouldn’t be getting any action those days just by themselves, but that’s not a problem for them, thanks to old chum Sandler.

Considering all this, is completely no surprise that the newest Sandler flick features an all-star ensemble cast (Kevin James, Chris Rock, David Spade, Rob Schneider, Salma Hayek, Maria Bello, Maya Rudolph, Joyce Van Patten, Ebony Jo-Ann, Di Quon, Steve Buscemi, Tim Meadows, Madison Riley) which coincide to mourn over the death of a basketball coach that made a difference in the lives of the starring male cast (once a champion team back in 1978). In the meanwhile, their families celebrate the 4th of July weekend, reconnecting to the simple things of life and patching up things between them and their children.

Too corny? Too much déjà vu? Too much toilet humor? The critics thought so, even without a saluting-the-flag-scene in the era of the first post-american president (God forbid!). For me, like most Adam Sandler movies, it was a truly entertaining movie, in spite of all its faults (real and alleged ones). It doesn’t need to promise. I go and watch it, totally sure that it will deliver.

Beyond that, to all the allegations of corniness and cheap sentimentalism, and the lack of warped personalities that make Hollywood pictures “interesting”, I would simply point that Egg-head made a movie about friendship, something in he truly believes, and you can realize it in real life, too.


This guy is so much better than you, critics.

Christine, wherever you are, please take 'em up!

Have you ever been driving a F-150 through the desert at dawn? Watching the full moon four times bigger as you watch it in the city? It doesn't matter, if you can drive a car you may have your perfect driving moment and you may still be keeping to yourself, because it is kind of a zen experience you don't want to ruin by sharing it with a stranger.

Anyway, I should thank first Stephen King for introducing me to the then unknown pleasures of driving at the tender age of 13. I read his best-seller Christine, and boy did my life change after that. I thought I could relate a lot to Arnie Cunningham, who always had to put up with tons of misery until he found a little happiness and then his life force would be taken from him for good.

But he was driving the perfect car: a red-white '58 Plymouth Fury. Made just for him. Oh, did I tell you before how much I like rock 'n roll? Every time I see a fiftysomething Chevrolet Bel-Air, a Pontiac or an old Studebaker, I remember immediatly:

From the Beach Boys to the Beatles to Jan and Dean and a very long et cetera, driving a cool car and rock 'n roll music belong together. But not anymore. In the name of political correctness and enviromentalism, we have to endure this:

Driving a car won't be as fun as it used to be. Thanks for nothing, GM.

Christine, wherever you are, please take 'em up!

"Kick Ass" kicks the comic books and superhero movies standards you know where

Warning: No big spoilers here - safe to read

By Dr. sipmac

¿Jan Luc Picard or James Tiberius Kirk? ¿Star Wars or Star Trek? ¿Law and Order or CSI? ¿DC or Marvel? Dr. sipmac's heart still belongs to the DC Universe, and he remembers how when he was a child he used to think of the Marvel superheroes as second-rate Super Friends wannabes. While Superman had a succesful major motion picture, Captain America had a lame movie to offer (a little research tells Dr. sipmac that it had to be one of the two 1979 TV Movies starred by Reb Brown or both). It was sometimes utterly painful to watch Peter Parker being regularly abused by J. Jonah Jameson, even if it was a cartoon. Hey, you can tell anything you want about Clark Kent, but he never took abuse from anybody just the way Parker did. And, ¿have you ever seen the dreadful Marvel cartoons of the WWII era?

But nowadays Dr. sipmac recognizes that Marvel has done a superior job since the begining, and always had the ambition to aim always for something different and edgier than its competitor, even within the boundaries of the Comics Code Authority. And it has handsomely paid off: The X Men movies, the Hulk movies, the Fantastic Four Movies, the Iron Man movies... and on the other side, a lame attempt to revive the Superman franchise and (fortunately) the Dark Knight.
Maybe Dr. sipmac oversimplyfies in his analysis, but you may think he's getting the overall picture right. Marvel connects a lot better with the readers than DC does and sets the trend where competitors parasitically thrive. The trendsetting example this time is, as the title already revealed, "Kick Ass". There is a lot of reviews for this movie, sip is not going to try to top, but he feels the need to share still a few more thoughts.

As in Tlön, Uqbar, Orbis Tertius, literature, even in the form of the "despicable" comic books is approaching reality and slowly reshapingly it. In the Golden Age of Comic books it took an extra-terrestrial or a multi-millionaire to fight crime; in the Silver Age the lead was taken by a geek that gained radioactive superpowers, and the modern age artists like to praise the exploits of superheroes with no powers, even no special training. Just like Kick Ass. Well, and that modern age Batman, the awesome and lethal Hit Girl.

For sip, it was hauntingly attractive to write a story about a superhero-without-powers for years. Well, you can say it's too late, it is already been done. But you didn't knew that the first requirement for that implausibly plausible character was his insanity. Yes, for Dr. sipmac it was clear from the beginning that the protagonist had to be a complete nutcase, with his madness barely concealed. Sip imagined an insignificant hard working clerk, a worthless peon tired with his mindless job, that decides to "fight evil" after working hours. He would dress as... a giant bird. He would drive an old clunker across the city until he could find something he could fight for.

And now you may think, sip, it's really too late. You are talking about Big Daddy, the father of Hit-Girl. No, sip is surely talking, er... retelling Don Quixote. Just think about it: take the superpowers or the special skills away from a costumed hero and tell me what you get? Don't be shy... yes, a ridiculous, insane and senseless person. A Don Quixote.

It surely can be found ideology traces in the comic book-movie tandem, but you (maybe) never thought you could find even deeper meaning in this externally harsh and coarse presentation. We need more Don Quixotes in this world.

What are you waiting for? Go and watch the movie!

Woody Allen, you're finally caught!

Happy New Year again! Dr. sipmac is still watching everything under (and above) the sun! Ever wondered about a mystery you didn't know it even existed? Well, Greywizard hit the jackpot! If you want to keep Hollywood alive, repeat, alive, please DO NOT watch a single Woody Allen movie again! Why? The webmaster of The Unknown Movies can explain it better:

He's been deceiving the public and his fellow filmmakers for years. All of his work is just a ruse for what his real aim is, and I am going to expose it right here and right now. And that is... WOODY ALLEN IS TRYING TO KILL HOLLYWOOD! You think I'm joking? Let's take a look at Allen's career as a writer/director. The first movie he wrote and directed was Take The Money And Run, released by Cinerama. Several years later, Cinerama closed its tents and went out of business forever. Then he moved to United Artists and made several movies there. What happened to United Artists? They declared bankruptcy several years later, and were absorbed by another studio. Allen then moved to Orion Pictures and made several movies there. I'll tell you what happened several years after he arrived: Orion declared bankruptcy. Allen then moved to Tri-Star and made a couple of movies. Not long afterwards, Tri-Star was finished as a studio and was turned into a brand that Sony uses to release movies they don't have confidence in. And look at the studios writer/director Allen has worked with (and given his curse) since. There's Miramax (the founders left the company and Disney has severely scaled back its releases), Touchstone (Disney has scaled it back severely as well), Fine Line (is now as dead as its parent company New Line), and Dreamworks (almost declared bankruptcy twice, and its remains and debts have been sold off). It's just a matter of time before we hear bad news about Fox Searchlight and the Weinstein Company, the distributors he has worked with recently. It's time to DECLARE WAR AND STOP HIS EVIL PLANS!

What about the Wenstein Company? The one with the Inglorious Basterds fame? Are you kidding me? Oh, you mean the one with the Nine fame? Uh-oh...

Imagen tomada de humorparatodos.com

Soap Opera values lurking in the real world

First, Dr. sipmac will give you three true recollections about soap operas that he has witnessed throughout the years:

• When he was a child, Dr. sipmac was watching on TV a very popular and convoluted melodrama, practically on the edge of his seat. Her mother passed by, took a look, and coldly dismissed the production by saying that real life was even more tortuous than a TV show.
• Years later, sip was listening to the radio. It was the prime time in the morning. For sure millions were listening in the whole country. A major Latin American female TV star was being interviewed live and she couldn’t recall in which soap opera did something. “Never mind”, she said coolly without bothering about it anymore at all, “all soap operas are the same”.
• A few years later a renowned Venezuelan script writer, bitterly disappointed by the flop of his latest work, stated on a variety show that there were only two types of soap operas: those based on Cinderella, and those based on the Count of Monte Cristo.

At least all of them were sincere. In the meanwhile, Dr. sipmac still can’t figure out how to blend these facts, neither how to develop them properly, but he’ll give it a try. Has melodrama really something to do with real life? Is it a somewhat idealistic but simplified version of the existence or the true mirror of it?

Everybody knows how TV shapes the trends and the behavior of the population. Particularly, sip knows exactly when a kid (specially a little girl) has been watching too many dramas: the gestures and the language are ridiculously grandiloquent, and they really do not match those of a normal child. Imposture, ersatz language and personality like that is not exclusive of the children: I recall reading Three Trapped Tigers (written by Guillermo Cabrera Infante), a very (apparently) disjointed recollection of the pre-revolutionary Havana nights. To someone familiar with the current trends, the books look on first sight like a compilation of internet jokes. One has to read several times to find the connections between chapters. Dr. sipmac makes the digression because he remembers a female character blending in the middle of an argument two cultures: she was walking away from her mother, and she hears a slur, then she turns back like Bette Davis… and start talking like in a radio drama. Golden Age of Hollywood meets Golden Age of Cuban Radio. Mere fiction? In real life, an old and dear neighbor learned to use the word “infamy” against sip’s granny thanks to “The Indomitable” a 70’s Venezuelan drama.

You could argue successfully it is not only the soap operas the only media artifacts that produce such unnatural behavior in people. Just almost everything, not just visual mediums only, but also printed matter, too. Then Dr. sipmac would have to point a finger to the soap operas, specially the way are made today. In a whole, Dr. sipmac feels the melodrama formula is a straitjacket conspiring to maintain certain mental climate that keeps the Latin American countries locked in the third world. Why? First, it is pure business without social responsibility (Remember, give the people what they want). Second, if there are only two types of soap operas; those based on Cinderella, and those based on the Count of Monte Cristo, which are the messages that are constantly put into the collective mind? Glad you asked. Forget that fairy tale about virtue and goodness triumphing over vice and evil, chapter after chapter people learn that:

• The only way to escape poverty for women is marring a rich fella, by any means necessary (Cinderella).
• There are no reliable institutions. There is no justice. The only way to get it is taking it by own hands (The Count).

Opportunism without law and order. Anarchy. Does not Latin America look like this? And Latin America is the kingdom of soap operas, isn’t it? Ever wonder how values are communicated in a society? Please, Dr. sipmac knows he is discovering nothing knew. But maybe you didn’t thought about this in a while.

But make no mistake: Dr. sipmac sounds pretty much like a leftist when he blames soup operas for brainwashing the people, but he wouldn’t forbid them if it were in his power. He believes it is a personal choice (for adults) to decide what to watch and thanks to the internet, when. For the children, you just have to watch the South Park movie.

Dr. sipmac has ranted.

FULL DISCLOSURE: The last soap opera Dr. sipmac watched willingly, was the original Ugly Betty. He quitted by the time she was celebrating her birthday. It took a whole week to celebrate a lousy birthday that wasn’t vital to the central plot! Puh-leeze!

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The Matrix as a Totalitarian Government Parable (A short and sloppy and improvised essay)

By Dr. sipmac

When a modern media production becomes a huge success with a huge fanbase, anything can happen. That anything means “on the verge of becoming a (major) religion”. Futurama has already toyed with the idea before lampooning the cult-like following of Star Trek and Star Wars (Where No Fan Has Gone Before, Episode 411). Now, enter The Matrix, that world described as “Harry Potter with guns”, where the cool women wear leather form head to toes, the remedy of ignorance is immediately downloadable and the illuminati barely conceal the contempt they have for those sheep-like bluepills, the way a politician fights for the people’s rights.

Alright, alright. What I said is not true. Neo and his dark-glassed combo are supposed to fight the evil machines (and computer programs that operates them) and free the humanity, but the fight does have a lot of “collateral-damage”, as seen in the highway scene. Looks like they have to destroy the village in order to save it. I can’t remember if it was Orwell who said that “a war must be fought brutally or not fought at all”. And what the humans do (at least in the simulated reality) looks like a guerilla war.

And, if humans are guerrilla, WHAT IS THE MATRIX? Glad you asked. The Matrix is the perfect allegory of a perfect totalitarian state, Ingsoc with an not-human Big Brother: The matrix takes all the decisions for its inhabitants: The matrix decides how and when to feed you. Everybody eats at the same Soylent Green by imposition (in a true egalitarian way), and if necessary, it could trick you into believing you’re eating something when you aren’t eating nothing, just by twitching your brain circuits. The matrix provides a nice cubicle (cell) where you live and die while believing you live in the open. It gives you the illusion of freedom and well-being while you’re “thriving” in slavery and misery. The Matrix controls every single aspect of your live while giving the illusion of self-determination we expect form a normal human being. The first act of freedom of a redpill is choosing an alias for hacking. It becomes their real name when freed.

It is curious that people in Russia, when they saw the movie for the first time, they saw as an praise of communism. Not even ten years after the collapse of the Soviet Union, and still blindfolded…

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