Three New Navy Ships (Collected from the Internet)

USS RONALD REAGAN

Seeing it next to the Arizona Memorial really puts its size into perspective... ENORMOUS!

When the Bridge pipes ' Man the Rail' there is a lot of rail to man on this monster: shoulder to shoulder, around 4...5 acres. Her displacement is about 100,000 tons with full complement...

Capability

Top speed exceeds 30 knots, powered by two nuclear reactors that can operate for more than 20 years without refueling

1. Expected to operate in the fleet for about 50 years

2. Carries over 80 combat aircraft

3. Three arresting cables can stop a 28-ton aircraft going 150 miles per hour in less than 400 feet

Size

1. Towers 20 stories above the waterline

2. 1092 feet long; nearly as long as the Empire State Building is tall

3.. Flight deck covers 4.5 acres

4. 4 bronze propellers, each 21 feet across, weighing 66,200 pounds

5. 2 rudders, each 29 by 22 feet and weighing 50 tons

6. 4 high speed aircraft elevators, each over 4,000 square feet


Capacity

1. Home to about 6,000 Navy personnel

2. Carries enough food and supplies to operate for 90 days

3. 18,150 meals served daily

4. Distillation plants provide 400,000 gallons of fresh water from sea water daily, enough for 2,000 homes

5. Nearly 30,000 light fixtures and 1,325 miles of cable and wiring 1,400 telephones

6. 14,000 pillowcases and 28,000 sheets

7. Costs the Navy approximately $250,000 per day for pier side operation

8. Costs the Navy approximately $25 million per day for underway operations (Sailor's salaries included).

USS BILL CLINTON

The USS William Jefferson Clinton (CVS1) set sail today from its home port of Vancouver , BC

The ship is the first of its kind in the Navy and is a standing legacy to President Bill Clinton 'for his foresight in military budget cuts' and his conduct while holding the (formerly dignified) office of President.

The ship is constructed nearly entirely from recycled aluminum and is completely solar powered with a top speed of 5 knots.
It boasts an arsenal comprised of one (unarmed) F14 Tomcat or one (unarmed) F18 Hornet aircraft which, although they cannot be launched on the 100foot flight deck, form a very menacing presence.

As a standing order there are no firearms allowed on board.

This crew, like the crew aboard the USS Jimmy Carter, is specially trained to avoid conflicts and appease any and all enemies of the United States at all costs.

An onboard Type One DNC Universal Translator can send out messages of apology in any language to anyone who may find America offensive. The number of apologies are limitless and though some may seem hollow and disingenuous, the Navy advises all apologies will sound very sincere.

In times of conflict, the USS Clinton has orders to seek refuge in Canada.

USS BARACK OBAMA

Details are as vague as his past, his economic policies and his credentials to lead. But don't you worry........he has a plan!

Related articles

• USS Ronald Reagan Returns to Pearl Harbor, Hawaii (damontucker.com)
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If Obama and his people were honest... (new and improved version!)

...he would be attaching execs salaries to balance sheets (company growth), not to stock values, or fixing a limit for the salaries. And instead of regulating salaries, he should be paying more attention to the unemployment rates.

This attitude encapsulates the worst of the worst of this crisis. But hold on a minute, please. Perhaps some people would disagree pointing out that there shouldn't be limits for rewarding the talent. But, who on earth would think the values of stocks would be skyrocketing forever? (Economists in the late 80's, the 90's and early 00's, the ones that sold the notion that it would be better to attach exec salaries and bonuses to stock perfomances - and specially Enron execs, those didn't believe in free markets or capitalism but economical and social darwinism-).

Balance sheets don't grow forever, either. But they rise slower and steadier than stocks. They do not tend to fall unexpectedly, after some political event or low market expectations. Hey, assets do not tend to dissappear right after the market crashes! A few exceptions: when the assets are stocks and bonds precisely, cooked accounting books (outright deceit) or stupid notions like mark-to-market accounting. The latter concept alone throws the accounting principle of conservadurism (not to mention the common sense): in everyday words, it is prudent to register a potential loss, but not to register a potential (and not earned) profit.

That said, what Dr. sipmac means is, this time somewhat agrees with Obama. Exec salaries and bonuses are tied up to completely irrational expectations. But ironically, Keynes never have been so utterly wrong. Long term thinking matters. Only short term thinking could sustain for so much time (ironically, again) those irrational expectations. But cutting salaries to the bone in the name of "social justice"? Plain demagoguery. You can't attract the best minds for jobs like these just for peanuts and beer money.

Company growth is a rational way to fix executive level salaries. The more you think about it, the more natural it looks. Balance sheets are the best way to measure the company growth.

It's incredible no one talks about this in the current crisis. Again, remunerations must be, more than fixed or regulated, corrected. I like that term better. The beneficiaries of this insane system will never agree to regulate themselves (It's so much money...). The market should have ended this anomaly, and in a way, it did: it crashed. But nobody realizes it this way. So, it looks fair that this time the goverment should meddle into this particular affair. But again, Obama's "social justice" attitude encapsulates the worst of the worst of this crisis. It's about human nature: absolutely nobody wants draconian pay cuts. Not even Hollywood stars.

Related articles

• How Dividends Can Destroy Value (blogs.forbes.com)
• How a Recession Affects Career Salaries (careeroverview.com)
• Obama To Hold CEO Summit Wednesday; Execs To Present Their Very Reasonable Demands For Ransom (crooksandliars.com)
• Obama Meets CEOs: A Bridge To Nowhere (247wallst.com)

43 Things Results - You May Want to Try!

I took the 43 Things Personality Quiz and found out I'm a

Lifelong Learning Healthy Builder

An Open Letter to D.A. Jack McCoy

In the war on crime, one of the worst things that uses to happen is bringing politics into the administration of Justice. Using the political prism for consideration, serious charges are likely to be trivialised and disminished, giving the opportunity to an offender to walk free, just because he is the darling of a movement or political party or has the right ideological sympathies. Fortunately, there are people that still consider that a crime is still a crime, especially when the defendant pleads guilty. These are their stories.

Ka-chunk!

Dear Mr. McCoy,

for many years I’ve been a big fan of your fine work as a District Attorney in New York City. Your genuine desire for see justice done, is enough for a remarkable person like you to keep on going for almost twenty years. And despite your well known personal flaws, you are still an inspiration for your co-workers and the audience, deserving all the respect you get.

In this order of ideas, we just saw on the September 25 episode which conviniently re-ran Saturday night, “Memo from the Dark Side,” how you were willing to prosecute the people responsible of torturing in Abu Ghraib, up to the one and only, the former VP Dick Cheney. Your message may be disgusting for some political interests, but very clear: Torture is a punishable crime, no matter who commits it, no matter for which interest it was committed.

That gives me confidence to ask you to prosecute and convict Mr. Roman Polanski, the celebrated film director, for the rape of a 13-year-old girl on the night of March 10th, 1977, in Los Angeles, California. For reasons I can’t comprehend there is a lot of outrage in France, Poland and the United States, but just because he was arrested in Zurich (Switzerland), before he, the accomplished filmmaker, was going to be honored with a lifetime achievement award. Facing extradition already, this should be a no-brainer for you after your last case: he already pleaded guilty, but fled on January 1st, 1978, to London, so that any previous agreement he reached with the early prosecution should be null and void by now.

Not your jurisdiction? Please, for someone like you, used to find and use tenuous rationales to charge defendants before they can walk, this should be easier than falling from a tree. Please don’t let this sex offender get away with rape. If necessary, police detectives Elliot Stabler and Olivia Benson of the S.V.U. would be of great help.

Thanks in advance for your great victory. According to the “ripped from the headlines” policy of your series, I’m confident that I will see justice prevail in an yet-to-be-shoot-but-sure-to-be-shoot episode.

Very Truly Yours,


Dr. sipmac

Beatles Catalog (Finally) Remastered – A satiric Beatles-wordplay-and-puns-free assessment

On September 9th, 2009, the entire Beatles original catalog was released to an always avid target: three loyal generations of Beatlemaniacs and unsuspecting buyers we could qualify as collateral damage. As we saw with the 2006 released Love, we could appreciate in the documentary how difficult it was to the producers to come up with decent mashups, even with the entire same catalog at disposition (Yeah, sure. Just look out for Beatles’ mashups in Youtube. Start with Paperback Believer). With this in mind we can infer how difficult it was the remastering of every single song released in the 13 official albums with the singles and EP original material without botching it.

Because it doesn’t matter how many times the marketing team ends up not with a bang but with a wimp: the original songs remained the same. Until now. With such a task, the EMI engineering team, supervised by none others than Paul, Yoko, Olivia and Ringo, worked 4 years straight… until they could not hear a Beatle song anymore. First they searched for similar experiences around the world. Finally, in Colombia they bought the 1998-produced 30 Grandes Exitos – Diomedes Díaz and the original albums. After carefully (and for most of them, painfully) listening, they knew then what to do exactly with the Beatles catalog:

* First, suppress all chat and greetings to zero. Otherwise the recordings get too mundane instead of classy. Since Let It Be… Naked was released in November 2003, people would know already what to expect. Oh! Sorry What Goes On Website, your work is not needed anymore.

* Get rid of embarrassing out-of-tune performances! That means you, Hold Me Tight! Ole Paul was literally forced to re-record the With the Beatles’ track entirely with the early technology and sing correctly this time. When he protested, George Martin said: “You saw this coming from 46 years ago!” Mr. Moonlight? Out with the annoying Hammond solo! And another slap in the wrist for Macca!

* As in "30 Grandes Exitos", where the guacharaca was suppressed and replaced for *stylish, refined* cymbals, the entire drums and percussion of the tracks were removed and replaced with a drum box! In an upcoming Rolling Stone interview, Ringo will talk about how he is finally fed up with being the butt of jokes and harsh and unfair criticism for his drumming job in the band, so he gave up all his work for a bigger share in the Beatles’ business. Finally a point for Macca (fair or unfair his drum parts weren’t removed)!

* Revolution 9 was supposed to be enhanced with disparaging remarks of Michael Jackson made by Paul, Yoko, Olivia and Ringo, but self-styled King of Pop’s death recent death made them quit the project.

* As a special gesture, Strawberry Field Forever was intended to be reworked since the late John was never satisfied with the final result, the originally 1967-released version. But it was not possible to contact him, in spite of all the attempts made.

* In the most controversial move, all non-Harrisongs lead and rhythm guitar work was scrapped and replaced for all new Macca and Eric Clapton’s work. In his final days, close to achieve another happier and peaceful plane of existence, George Harrison couldn’t care less about the request and gave his permission to this. If this was the way for Macca to “finally set things straight”…

Well, speaking seriously now I wish the entire work can be heard as I heard Let It Be… Naked for the first time. Thank you, lads!

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• Your Guitar Weeps Because it is Terrified: The Beatles' Scariest Songs

• The Beatles music to be sold on iTunes for first time (mirror.co.uk)
• RAPatton: The Beatles on iTunes at last? [Update] | Pop & Hiss | Los Angeles Times (latimesblogs.latimes.com)
• What if the Beatles never broke up? - THE BEATLES RELEASING COLLECTIVE (saidthegramophone.com)
• David Wild: Giving Thanks to Paul, Ringo & the Long and Winding Road (huffingtonpost.com)
• Ringo Starr Biography (mademan.com)
• PHOTOS: Paul McCartney, Yoko Ono Finally Friends? (huffingtonpost.com)
• Surviving Beatles attend George Harrison film premiere (availableworld.wordpress.com)
• Beatles Reunite! Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr Join Forces to Honor George Harrison (eonline.com)